So...no one is panicking...?

It was a quiet sort of morning. Lazy, one might even say. The marine layer of fog was still clinging to the sky as we drank our coffee. With not even a hint of foreboding we headed out on our first mission of the day- bank. And donuts. Do not forget the donuts. We certainly didn't. In fact, we decided to go for the donuts first. Primo's Donuts is a small little shop, established in 1956, that still has a delightfully un-corporate feel. Its fresh raspberry jam donuts and regular customers are far removed from the mass production and transcontinental shipping of corporate America. But I digress.
We returned from the bank (and the donuts!) and began a quest for tickets to the Hollywood Bowl the following Saturday. I was seated on the floor, Timur in the chair at the computer. We were laughing about the antics of one Eric Idle when the floor began to shimmy. Quake, if you will.
"Um...Timur...?" I said from my spot on the floor.
"That's an earthquake," he replied and moved to stand in the door frame as the shaking continued. It wasn't a particularly severe sort of shaking, more like the movement of jello on a plate when you carry it from the fridge to the table. We heard the plates and glasses rattling in the cupboards and Timur informed me that, yes, I too should stand in a doorway (this, as I discovered later, being the most structurally sound part of the house).
It was all over in twenty seconds or so, and I laughed with incredulity. An earthquake! A real one! They happen! This is why tall bookshelves should be bolted to the walls!
We turned on the news and then the real drama began. Our fearless anchors quickly informed us that they'd been subjected to at least thirty seconds of severe shaking, with the hanging lights swinging wildly over their desks. We soon found out that the magnitude of the earthquake was 5.8 and that it's epicenter was 2 miles from Chino Hills. (For the purpose of comparison, the May earthquake in China's Sichuan province measured a 7.9 on the scale, and no, it's not a linear scale.) Following their journalistic noses, our stalwart anchors, who I shall name Fran and Stan, soon had a caller from Chino Hills on the line. He told them of the thirty seconds of shaking and the dishes falling from his shelves and breaking on the floor. Stan informed the intrepid caller that they'd had a similar experience at the studio, some 15 miles from the epicenter. The plot thickened as they laid out bait for their innocent caller- was he scared? was there damage? could he see damage in his neighborhood? No bite. On to the the police reports.
"Well, no damage has been reported so far, but I'm sure there will be reports of interior damage, breaking lamps and such, soon," reported Fran with a breathless urgency. I might be exaggerating just a bit, but the news coverage quickly turned into a search for the story. You know, tears, drama, intrigue. Somewhere, someone is upset. Cut to Disneyland!!
The high angle camera showed people evacuating from the rides, and...music playing...?
"So," Stan asked their on-scene reporter, "no one is panicking?"
No. There were no screaming children or irate parents. There were no stampedes or threatened lawsuits. So much for the "Disneyland becomes playground for terror!" angle.
The USGS website offered far more actual data and information on the quake. Timur and I were soon engaged in their excellent maps and muted Fran and Stan. These devoted journalists had nothing to say when deprived of drama. Without an emotional hook, they failed to provide their viewer with anything other than the most rudimentary of information. The television news rides on a rush of emotion and adrenaline- actual data seems to play a very limited role on broadcast networks. Ah well, I'm sure their next story about the new celebrity babies was much more fascinating, but I was too interested in maps of peak ground acceleration to pay them much mind.

Coming soon...Culture in Southern California! Moving to Koreatown! Maybe even a recipe for a fantastic Lemon Sour Cream Cake!